What I’ve left out until now

The savvy reader may have pieced together the secret story of these posts so far. On a personal note, I hate it when the implicit is made grossly explicit in writing, and so I often bury my meanings in events and descriptions. I do this fairly intentionally, but also because the meanings seem so painfully and embarrassingly obvious to me. My writing has been critiqued for not making its points clear. I like to think that it is not important to “get it” in the traditional sense, and that “getting it” is of little value without some act of transformation being perpetrated on the reader. But that is a discussion for some other time and in some other forum.

This story, now, please, is about a transformation that is coming about intentionally and with an abundance of surprises. Flying North, instead of Northwest, across the pole. I mean, really people, The North Pole. Coming to a city that is rebuilding itself before our eyes. Being in a hotel with folk tales and history inscribed on its 18 story facade. Walking into a world of idioms and fables.

Ellen explained to Katherine, whom she adopted from Vietnam over 12 years ago, that Daddy may be excited because he has never done this before, that the two of them got to make a family together long before he showed up, and that he is finally getting to do this too. All true. And.

I must admit, I must admit, that although I could anticipate what would change, that although I knew, in advance, the route, the journey has wrought deeper changes in me, and my family (already) than I had imagined possible. Had I dreamed of the possibilities? I dream deeply, my friends.

Let me share these dreams. There is this tiny nearly 10 year old girl who won’t go to sleep because she is reading a book of princess fairy tales retold as Barbie stories written in Chinese that her Papa and Mama bought for her. Shi Hui and I speak virtually none of the same language, but we open Google Earth and look at the world together, places near here, places in Africa, Antarctica! She unclasps my watch from my wrist and puts it on her slender wrist and takes it off, and puts it back on mine, takes it off, puts it back on…

I am watching a good/bad Hollywood movie with my family all in the bed together. My wife has turned over, all but asleep at 8pm. My daughter, Katherine, has her head on my shoulder. I am hiding my daughter, Shi Hui’s hand in mine chanting “Where is the hand?” which she repeats back to me. “Where did it go?” More of the same. “I don’t know!” She’s still keeping up. I open my hand, “Here it is!” Laughter. Katherine asks, “Why is she laughing?” and nuzzles in a little closer. My wife snores quietly. “Where is the hand?”

Yue Xiu Park

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Legend has it that 2000 years ago, Guangzhou was a city of hard working people, who suffered only because they could not grow enough food. Five immortals came to the city in the form of rams, and each ram held sheaves of rice in its mouth. They gave the people the rice, and afterward, the people prospered, finally relieved of the burden of not enough food.

The sculpture of the five rams is the centerpiece of Yue Xiu park, which is also the symbolic center of Guangzhou.

20140507-052206.jpgso, the “World of Fables and Idioms” this must be. In the midst of perpetual construction, a French superstore

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We stopped in the park to take photographs,

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Official

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Today at 9 am, we revisited the Adoption Registry Center of Guangdong Province. We were the first family there. Like every other family, we began the process on Monday, made our donation to the orphanage and filled out the application for adoption, and today we finished the process, which included an official photograph, a five minute interview, and a visit to the Center notary. By 10 am, Zhong Shi Hui was officially transformed from a ward of China, to Shi Hui Brennan, member of the clan Brennan and nascent citizen of the USA.

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Older

I will never have another moment in my life quite like the one when Shi Hui shot out of the waiting room looked at me, shouted “Papa!” and threw herself into my arms.

We had sent pictures of our family that were put into a scrapbook ages ago (or so it seems), and it clearly had become a cherished object to our daughter to be. After the initial exuberance, which only devolved into secondary exuberance, she showed us our photos, pointing at them that at each of us in turn. “Papa!” “Mama!” “Jei Jei!” She knew us well.

And now a word on the joy of adopting an older child. He or she will know you in a way that a younger child will not. Shi Hui claimed us when she bounded out to greet us. Not only was she ours, we were very much hers, and she left no doubt about it.

Bed time

At the end of the day Shi Hui (which is pronounced something more like “Shuh way”) is not ready to fall asleep. Ellen sings to her (“Dream a Little Dream of Me” and “Mary Had a Little Lamb”), while I download kids’ books onto my iPad.

Then I head in for the inaugural reading of The Cat in the Hat. She wants to scroll the pages forward–and backward–but eventually we settle into the story. Afterwards, Google Earth, which conveniently shows exactly where we are. If you at home type in China Hotel, Guangzhou, our room is now in the central portion looking out over the pool (the jackhammering kept getting in the way of afternoon naps).

Of course, the next trip on the globe was our home in Norfolk, so I tracked a line from Guangzhou all the way around the world to the three story house on our street. “Your house. Your home. Papa. Mama. Jei Jei. Mei Mei.” “Papa! Mama! Jei Jei! Mei Mei!” Our girl does indeed speak in perpetual exclamations.

Then I brought up pictures of the Boeing 777 that will fly us around the world, found a seating chart and once again pointed to where each of us will sit. “Jei Jei. Mei Mei. Mama. Papa.” Katherine by the window. Shi Hui in the middle, Mama on the aisle, and Papa across the aisle. No four across seating on the 777. And, once again–with feeling–“Jei Jei! Mei Mei! Mama! Papa!” as she pointed back to those seats.

If you haven’t figured it out, “Jei Jei” means big sister, and Katherine is truly the big sister now. And “Mei Mei” means little sister. “Mama” and “Papa” kind of speak for themselves.

Routines

End of our first day, and after dinner Shi Hui brushed her teeth, then insisted on a shower. The patterns of her day have been settled by a rigorous routine.

We have been asked a dozen times (or more) about how she will adjust to our American culture, and we are completely aware that the main adjustment will be from her orphanage culture to our non-orphanage culture. We have to be aware of her transition from a regular and regimented life ingrained over the past nearly 10 years of her life to the playful patterns that we take for granted. For a while, at least, we will have to embrace regularity.

At the Adoption Registry of Guangdong Province

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The Adoption Registry Center of Guangdong Province is on a nondescript street, at the “Fortune Commercial Flats.” The elevator to the 8th floor has a patchwork plywood floor that doesn’t quite match the level of the actual floor. Still there is a room of wonderments. Shi Hui dashed out of the waiting room. “Papa!” “Mama!” “Sister!”

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How many cranes?

Our American cities are pantheons to the International style in architecture: great glass boxes stretching skywards; verticality accentuated by thin ribs like pinstripes. It is the style that emerged in the 30s and ate skylines in the 40s and 50s (and beyond).

Here, a student of architecture of the past 50 years would gaze into a textbook. Cement facades overtake glass and steel adding textures and colors to the cityscape.

The skyline is riddled with cranes, sweeping high, and reconstructing the city in the image of the present, which is also the image of the hoped-for future.

The China Hotel’s walls are incised with illustrations, and those drawings are repeated on the 18 story towers flanking the central structure of the building. The pictures tell the story, taken from fairy tale and history, of princes and princesses and caravans. It is the story of trade, which is the master plot of Guangzhou.

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